Loss and Squished Lemons

A coworker that I really like announced that she was leaving for another job today. The news was unwelcome. Do not mistake me, I am very happy for her but it just punctuated feelings of loss I continue to experience. My sister who is now married has moved away, one of my best friends is leaving for another state and although they say the only constant part of life is change, I hate it. Two different people tried to comfort me today by reminding me that I was about to leave for my own adventure but it was little consolation. Things shift. People grow. There is moving on for education, work, relationships and life but I somehow feel like that time lapse subject who stays stationary while the crowd shifts around her: still and silent, waiting for something as the world moves.

My sister teased me about not including her parties in my blog a few weeks ago. Although the gatherings were charming with good food, lovely friends and warm laughter all in attendance, I could not find the words to write about them. They symbolize the kind of bittersweet ends and beginnings that denial alone can tame.

So here I am again, with adaptation on the horizon, missing my close friends those both gone and those about to leave for new experiences. In this type of showdown, when pusillanimity often wins out over grit, it is time to choose courage over cowardice and love over fear. Things will work out. Thanks to advances in communication, friends are never that far. For now, the chin stays pointed toward the clouds and that pile of lemons gets squished and mixed with water and sugar.